is your mom at the bar?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
