I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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