Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
