he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
