I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
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