Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
