margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
