Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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