I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Randomize
