she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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