Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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