well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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