I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
