Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
