so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
