Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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