I hate your face
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
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