So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Everclear isn't food dammit
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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