Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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