we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
