hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
