i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
