can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
