remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
