addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
