My sheets look like a crime scene.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Randomize
