now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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