New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
