i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
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