Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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