Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
