: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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