why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
