i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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