we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Send help, water and tortillas.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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