By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
