How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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