Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
can u get pink eye on your cock?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
