I heard we made out
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
And then my night got REAL pukey
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
