Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
