The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
