No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Randomize
