The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
