im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
