i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She bit a glass in half.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
