HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
