scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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