is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
It's rum buckets o'clock
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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