So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
