Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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